Remember when you used to have free time pre baby?

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Can I just be totally honest with you for a moment? I was one of those “friends” that thought that all of my friends with babies who said they didn’t have time to do anything were full of shit.

I am now a mom who barely has time to brush her own hair.

It’s honestly crazy how hands on full time never pee alone again being a mom is. On the days I am in workout clothes still at 8pm and haven’t showered, I envy those moms that go back to work. The moms that can drive in the car quietly and go inside Starbucks instead of the drive thru. The moms that curl their hair everyday and wear high heels, while I am just over here wondering if 3pm is an acceptable time to open chardonnay.

But then as quickly as that fantasy enters my mind it quickly leaves. I do LOVE being home with Jack and witnessing all the meltdowns and showing the parking lot of Marshalls my boobs because I have to breastfeed or it will be hell on earth on the drive home. As fun as those things are, it’s the moments when he decides he will put his head on my shoulder and wrap is tiny hands around me and take a nap. Holy hell that makes everything worth it.

Being home is amazing and chaotic all at once. I now know that my friends were not bullshitting me and that it takes a special kind of person to be devoted to someone 24 hours a day 7 days a week, that person is a mama. I have such respect for the work that we all do as mothers whether we are stay at home or at work that doesn’t matter. Raising a tiny person who shits his pants and sneezes in your mouth is something a lot of men couldn’t do quite like we can (sorry men if you’re reading, we love and appreciate you doing the whole providing thing).

The point to this little rant/ piece of my mind is that we should all give ourselves a break because we are doing the best we can in the best way we know how. I am a total control freak so sometimes I freak the F out when I can’t do the million things I wanted to do that day. I am practicing just surrendering and enjoying these little moments with my child before he’s so big he doesn’t need his mommy anymore ( I may have to start drinking the harder stuff when this happens).

As mamas we don’t have all the time in the world to get our “lists” done and we sure as hell don’t have the time to do what we used to. But, we GET TO spend our “time” being a mother and that’s the most amazing thing I’ve experienced thus far.