I am SUUUUper excited for this month's Modern Mama, Ashley Hewett because she happens to be my best friend and I love her dearly, and she's fucking gorgeous. She is the most loving and kind mother and such a fashionista! I copy her regularly, oh and a total #bossmama owning her own hair salon Top Knot!
I'll let her take it form here!!
TMM: Introduce yourself: What’s your name, the name of your kid(s), and where are you from?
Ashley: I am Ashley Hewett, My daughter Gwendolyn just about 1 ½. Both my husband Rustin and I grew up in Vista California and our family now lives just a few miles away in Carlsbad.
TMM: How has becoming a mom changed you?
Ashley: Becoming a mom has changed me in many ways. It is single handedly the best thing I have done with my life. There is no way to possibly describe that moment you hold your child for the first time. My life served a new purpose, to do everything in my power to give this baby the best life I possibly could. I want to lead by example, to show her what a strong, successful, confident woman looks like. It is definitely no easy task though, it may look like rainbows and butterflies on social media pages, but no one really wants to see a screaming toddler throwing her hourly tantrum right? I had no idea that your body basically belongs to your baby as long as your breast feeding, oh and that baby wants to be attached to your boob 24/7 goodbye modesty! But, yes I miss that stage now no doubt. Motherhood feels like there is a microscope placed on every action you make. My patience is tested daily. One minute I am pulling my hair out the next minute my heart is bursting with Love.
TMM: How do you stay connected to yourself while still being a full time mom?
Ashley: I stay connected to myself by exercising, and working as a hairstylist and co-owner of Top Knot Hair Salon. I love being outdoors and I have loved snowboarding since I was a teenager, so I definitely feel at home on the mountain in the winter. This now has its own set of challenges with a toddler, but I am able to get my outdoor exercise in close to home with Gwen in tow thanks to Fit4Mom Stroller Strides. We started when Gwen was 5 weeks old and have been going ever since. The exercise keeps me in shape and the amazing moms keep me sane. Top Knot is my second baby, I have wanted to be a hairdresser and own a hair salon for as long as I can remember. In high school I would braid my cheer squads hair for football games, which is probably why I love doing hair for weddings. I love making women feel beautiful, this is the other thing that gives me purpose.
TMM: Red or White wine?
Ashley: Cabernet all the way (see what I did there?) haha
TMM: What’s something that you are grateful for since becoming a mother?
Ashley: I am so grateful for the love my daughter shows me, her hugs and kisses and “I love you” make all the shitty diapers, tantrums, and lack of sleep worth it. I am also incredibly grateful for my friends and family. The bond my husband and daughter share… I CAN’T! It makes me tear up thinking about it, just so sweet. I NEVER used to ask anyone for help for anything. Motherhood has humbled me, when they said it takes a village, they were not kidding. I am thankful for that village, you know who you are. I love you.
TMM: What’s one trick or tip someone’s given you that you could share with the TMM community in regards to motherhood?
Ashley: DO NOT GOOGLE ANYTHING! Your intuition is your best friend, and so is that community of moms you have. If you are worried, follow your instincts, ask the Pediatrician, and ask your mom community they are my saving grace every single time. You are not alone. I promise you, someone else has gone through it. Even things that sound crazy most likely are actually totally normal.
TMM: What could you be caught wearing most days?
Ashley: No one tells you how hard it is to find time to get ready right? I do my best to keep it stylish, I do love fashion, but thankfully the casual look is “in” which helps speed up the process when you have a toddler pulling every single thing out of the bathroom cabinet or crying for your attention. Most days start with workout clothes and if all the stars have aligned in my favor end in something more attractive.
TMM: How long were you in labor with your baby(s)?
Ashley: I was 4 days past her due date, so they had me come in at 2 pm for a “ non-stress test” which is nothing short of stressful. I never had Braxton hicks so I couldn’t have told you what a contraction felt like but, I thought while there, I might be having them and come to find out I was. The Dr. was worried about Gwen’s heart rate so she wanted me to go to the hospital to be monitored. I freaked out because I planned on having Gwen naturally, no drugs, and labor at home. I called Rustin and my Doula freaking out and totally in denial that I was going to have a baby. I went home Rustin came home and I delayed the car ride as long as I could I was afraid that they would try to induce me. We got to the hospital 5 hours later at 7pm at this point I was having some contractions but still in denial. The Midwife was shocked when she found I was 6 centimeters dilated. So I was admitted and told that at 11pm they would decide whether I needed to be induced (which I prayed to god I would not need) I felt like I was going to be there a while so I called the doula and said come at 11pm. Well, the second I stepped into that delivery room shit got VERY VERY real! I will spare you all the details from that point.. Gwen was born naturally at 11:17pm and my doula showed up right after. (This was my fault) But, my husband made the very best doula anyway. So to make a short question long it was a very unexpected 4 hours.
TMM: What is one thing you do to keep a healthy lifestyle?
Ashley: This will sound cliché , but I exercise and eat right ( most of the time) its all in moderation right? Stroller Strides and getting my 10,000 steps thanks to my handy apple watch has helped get my body back and more importantly it’s incredibly important for my mind as well.
TMM: What is one thing you did as a teenager that you hope your kid(s) won’t do LOL?
Ashley: God help me if Gwen is anything like I was as a teenager. I am sorry mom.
TMM: At TMM we believe that self-care is right up there with breathing. So, what do you do to make sure you are taking care of you?
Ashley: I always brush my teeth twice a day (lol) Truthfully, I have given up a lot of my favorite self care beauty regimens. But, I still find time to exercise and if I am really lucky I paint my nails, put on my Arbonne mask, and pour myself a glass of wine.
TMM: What’s in your purse?
Ashley: My diaper bag is my purse, so lets see, diapers, butt cream, baby shoes, a change of baby clothes, boogy wipes , sippy cup ,cell phone, wallet, and of course my favorite Arbonne rose lipstick.
TMM: What’s your favorite curse word?
Ashley: There are a lot of “You have got to be fucking kidding me?!” moments with a toddler in tow.
TMM: What is one beauty tip or trick you love?
Ashley: Hair talk: After I shampoo and Condition I use Unite’s 7Seconds Leave in conditioner, and a wet brush = My BFF I literally cannot live without them. Then when it comes time to wash your hair and you just can’t find the time, use Kevin Murphy’s Fresh Hair. It’s the BEST dry shampoo you will ever use. We have all of this at Top Knot if you want to try it out.
TMM: Anything else you care to share about motherhood or supporting women in general…?
Ashley: Make friends with other moms, Few things can bond complete strangers together like sharing the trials and tribulations of parenthood. Love every minute, even the shitty times when you want to give up and think “ WTF I cant take it anymore” when you embrace the chaos it free’s you from so much stress, harder than it seems, this I know very well. Pour yourself a glass of wine when you put your babes to bed, you deserve it. Hell, you kept a kid alive all day, way to go Mama!
Thank you so much Ashley for sharing your heart with us!